The tree outside my ninth-floor window is within arm’s length. Closest to the window is a stubby pseudo-branch–it’s a little jagged at the end, which makes me think the maintenance guys sawed it off when it started to get a little fresh with the building. Perfect for a birdfeeder!, I thought. What a fun, interesting way to interact with nature!, I thought.
Let me tell you some things about birds.
- They’re picky. I’ve got a jay who comes and systematically tosses out every piece of birdseed from the feeding trough till he finds the kind he likes.
- They’re stupid. The titmice have not yet figured out that tapping on the birdfeeder does not yield food (notable subpoint: the titmice come early in the morning).
- They’re ravenous. I filled up the feeder halfway this morning before I left, and when I got back around dinnertime it was basically gone. The birds are eating my booze money.
- They’re ungrateful. I just want to take a picture! Don’t fly away!
Here are the advantages of having a birdfeeder outside my window:
- Birds are kinda cute (especially the titmice).
- I get to complain about them on my blog.